Give the people what they want…Wedding recap 2

Day of (leading up)

We had a pretty detailed schedule for the day of. I had told M that I wouldn’t be able to sleep and hence put my wake-up at 6am. To my lucky surprise, I slept until almost 8am! This was only the first of many calming  happy-stances that occurred that day. The plan was to have M head to the venue and get our helper-people organized and feed them donuts and coffee while I stayed at the rental to get our other helper’s cars loaded with all of our décor. Much to my surprise all of our stuff fit easily into the first two cars. So we threw up a sign (and sent text messages) to those who were one there way and everyone was headed to the venue.

 

(every picture said Groom Ride or Bride Room, whoops!)

We had 1 hour from 10-11am to get the decorating done and our super crew came through! We finished almost on the dot and the room looked exactly like what I had imagined. I was SO ecstatic about how great everything looked and (to toot my own horn) really proud of how organized things were. That being said, M and I each had our own snafu; he had forgotten the webcam for the photobooth and I had failed to pack the scoops for candy. The best man graciously headed to our house to get the webcam and the scoops were just lost forever.

 

Seeing M so early in the day and helping decorate are some of the best decisions I made for myself for this whole thing.

My mom and others had tried to implore me to leave it to others but it was one of the most fun and relaxing hours of the day. With decorating done the ladies headed back to the vacation rental for hair and makeup. This was an area of fear for me; if the hair/makeup person didn’t show up and I was left to scramble…that would be bad. The stylist I found (on craigslist) was there a touch early which was a huge relief and she did an awesome job, even stayed calm when we had to wash some gunk out of my hair (bonfire grit and general dry scalp don’t make your updo pretty).

Everyone kept trying to feed me and make sure I had everything I needed. It was too sweet and cute…though even for them I couldn’t eat the fake meat sandwich they brought me.

 

In the meantime, the men were hanging out and having sushi for lunch and taking pictures of air fresheners.

Time felt CRAZY slow and then all of the sudden the photographer was there, and it was REAL real. Before I knew it I was putting on my dress (there is no sweeter sound than an effortless zipper on such a big day). 

OK, I will sign off here for tonight so I guess there’ll be a bit more before we get to the good stuff.

When the readers demand…Wedding Recap

I just got slammed by 20% of my readers (DSF) demanding that I do wedding recaps. So I’ll give it a shot.

Pre

The time leading up to the wedding is a total happy blur for me. And I think it may have come off the sweat of my future husband’s brow. While I was off being pampered (thanks ladies!) he was busy coordinating picking up keys to our rental and figuring out tuxedo fittings and putting pork tacos in a crock pot and picking up rentals and etc. etc. etc.

The rental property turned out to be so cute and perfectly suited for prepping flowers and getting ready. Plus there were goodies for us (add that to the list of above things that put sweat on his brow)!

Wednesday evening we finished up the last of the wedding projects. The photo seating chart. Despite my best judgment I allowed a jet-lagged ex-pat to man the exacto knife but no fingers were lost.

Thursday we did the wedding task that I got THE MOST grief about. From the most liberal minded wedding people to the most conservative ones they were very concerned about my floral plan. But the time had come! Speedy, Ali and one of my oldest friend-family Jenna and I all went to Pike’s Place Market and left with arms full of amazing flowers. We arranged them back at the rental and they turned out AMAZING (if I do say so)!

Thursday’s plans all relied heavily on DSF and her hubby. While we were at the rehearsal, trying to coax my middle nephew into doing his job,

they took decorations to our rehearsal dinner site and then staked out a fire-pit on the beach for our get together later that night. It all went off without a hitch and I can’t thank them enough (forgetting to send them some pizza is high on my (very short) list of wedding regrets). The ‘smore party was exactly what I hoped for. Seeing all of my loved ones for a few extra relaxed minutes was a VERY good thing.

Wedding Post #13: Keratin, melanin, etc.

(though really shouldn’t be a wedding thing)
It is sort of sad but true that a wedding is a kick in the pants to get some of the nagging things that bother you about yourself straightened out. Maybe it is the fact that you’re about to permanently take on a whole other person’s probably numerous (except my M…perfection) flaws that you think it is best to get your act together.

Weight, style, makeup, jewelry are on my list but MUCH higher than that are SKIN and HAIR (nails also fit the title of the post and they bug me too).
Skin: I tried tackling this head on. I remembered the sage advice of my college Roomie. She said that the most important thing with skin care was consistency. So I decided to take on a 3 prong (think proactive…hey, if cleanser(BP), toner (SA) and moisturizer (lowSA) work for Justin Beiber…). And I took it on full force. Every morning and night, religiously. The first weeks (as warned) were UGLY and painful. Then ---Right back to my standard blotchiness. Then, I went to Vegas. Benzoyl peroxide products warn strongly to wear SPF and I did. But apparently not enough. My face felt like sand paper. It was not right. It was as though the UV light disintegrated any tight junctions between my face cells and they were all free to wrinkle up or fall or otherwise evacuate my face. It scared me away from my regimen BIG TIME and now I am back to Cetaphil and Olay morning/night. I couldn’t deal.


So what is my next move? I have looked up dermatologists in my insurance network. But do I just call one up? What will she do? How long will it take before my skin becomes an amazing palette (and doesn’t disintegrate in the sun…very important to me)

HAIR

I am more optimistic on this one. I have decided to get a Brazilian blowout. I go in for it on Saturday and I may have let my hopes get a bit too lofty. I am imagining shine and relaxed (relative to what I have that should be expected). I will report back with progress on the hair front or you’ll see me in a Pantene commercial (though I won’t be able to use/nor do I use now Pantene…sulfates. Not a curly girl’s friend).



Self improvement is hard!

Wedding post #10: We're moving to the east coast!

Yeah right. Yuck!
But I do feel like it'd help our wedding decor significantly.

When I lived in CT I LOVED (loved!) a store called the Christmas Tree Shop. It was weird and awesome. They just sell random stuff. I'm actually not sure what took me inside one the first time but once I saw the world of cheap/cute things, I was hooked. They sell lots of home decor items, door hangers for all occasions (my sister still hangs the Halloween one she got there), cute ceramic and glass dishes and a whole slew of kids personalized items. It is weird and fun.

I was determined to visit the store on my little trip to Mass. Luckily for me there was a store only 3.8miles away. Score! I jumped into a cab to go see my cute, fun, random, cheap stuff. A $23 cab ride later (haha) i was there. And they did not disappoint. There were still adorable things all over. Our house could have been decorate dot the nines for Valentines and prepared for Easter all for under $20. They had a line of Victorian tea pots and serving dishes (would be amazing for a dessert buffet or a bridal shower tea party). They had candles as far as the eye could see, both standard and flameless (more on this later). There were all types of lanterns and assorted baskets.
Sigh, so much stuff that could be potentially very useful. But I didn't know what exactly we'd need and there was no way to get it all home anyway.

So I walked away.
But not without a couple fun things:

I got the most adorable birthday bunting ($2.99), If the colors were right I'd try to get the letters off to use the bunting.


Fairy bags for my little girl attendants ($0.79)



Personalized barrettes for my flower girl ($2.99)



Other random assorted stuff (namely musical cards)

(all that plus a $23 cab ride)
Their logo...



Why yes, I DO!

When I was done there I decided I could manage the T to get home (my old Roomie will probably look back fondly at this) by taking the Orange line to the red line and getting off near MIT.



Took me WAY too long to find the T station (Sullivan Station). Like, an hour and i think I walked 2miles or so. But once on the train I was all good.

So, east coast here we come Captain!

(YEAH RIGHT, YUCK!)

Wedding post #9: Go-go Wedding Glo-site

So we’ve officially signed up for our glosite (www.glosite.com/). It is an electronic event organizer with digital wedding stationary. I first saw this on apracticalwedding.com and was immediately in love with how modern and smart (and well suited to my ineptitude in paper crafting) this approach is. I love it. Mainly cause invitations aren’t something that I care too much about. I have looked and looked and there isn’t anything that grabs me. Plus I have a deep seeded editor fear; once you print something and send it along, that is locked. I love the flexibility of xml (M, correct me if that isn’t the appropriate term). I am excited to try to make it an interactive site and get guests info and input.




I am having the same issue on Glo that I have in the real world though. I am not finding a template that works for me. So we’re setting out to design a pretty pretty special one.

I hope people find it useful and that we will actually make sprucing it up a wedding priority. It is gonna be sweet! We get to ask our guests questions and get more real time info. Hopefully it doesn’t blow too many minds that there is no “Formal Invite to Follow.” Well, no, there will be a formal invite…just electronic. Hopefully that will blow people’s minds, for the better.

Wedding post #6: Unstrap my heart?

OK, I may later deny saying this but...I like strapless dresses.

Humph

This is a startling turn of events that I need to process. I still hate the idea of hiking up my dress and worry that throughout the day my decolletage will head south. But I have liked how they look and am starting to think that straps tend to weigh me down or make me look extra short.

I would post pics of me in a couple of styles but haven't decided my final feelings on M seeing me all bride-y or not (and since I can't make him un-see things I need to decide that first). Message me if you want pics :P

My dress shopping experience has been kinda pitiful to date, mainly because I'm a cantankerous old lady apparently. I find it RIDICULOUS (my Omi's favorite word to use when exasperated) that you need to make an appointment at the mega-chains -looking at you David!- to try on dresses. My experience at one David's Bridal was so strange. I got there and was told I needed and appointment. We wandered the quite empty store a bit looking sad and the host at the door took pity (on a potential paying customer) and said I could try on 3 dresses. When one of the many free employees took me back to the dressing room she was told that I only could do 3. The hostess had measured me and told me my size and between my mom and I we picked 3 dresses. One was lace with wide straps fit-and-flare, one was an A-line with spaghetti straps and the final was strapless fit-and-flare but they only had this one in a size down from what the hostess had suggested.

The first dress was pretty but the straps and heaviness of the lace made me look short. The second dress didn't have any shape and made me think that A-line is a no-go. The caveat is that the first two were too big and without anyone with giant clips they looked kind of dumpy. The third fit great and I loved the shape. Without the straps I felt taller, too.

This is where the trip got really strange/annoying to me. I figured that one of the many employees wandering around would decide to join us and maybe grab a few dresses or offer shoes/veils/general tips, you know, acknowledge our presence. But it was crickets. I reluctantly took off the third dress (it is a good sign that I didn't want to take it off) and got dressed. Then I asked the hostess about pricing on dress number three (I think I kind of loved it) and she pointed me to a sign...huh? Seems like when a customer actually acts like they might buy something you could perk up a bit. Very strange.

 I absolutely feel like Say Yes to the Dress has made all salons feel like they should attempt to take on an air of aloofness and elitism. Earth to David's Bridal... You are the big box store. People go to you for price and convenience.

But like I said I am just an old grouch and have to get over it.
Good news though is that trying on dresses is WAY less traumatic than I thought it would be and I think, in the end, will require less therapy afterwards than I was expecting.

So, I need to do more dress shopping after I get the required licenses and permits and the 3 letters of recommendation. But I'm confident I'll find something now. And, just maybe it'll be sans straps.

Wedding post #5: If you plan it, they will have fun?

Now that we’re settling into a venue I can start to address my single biggest fear about this whole thing. What if people don’t have fun? It is seriously the single most stressful thought I have. Marrying M, piece of cake. Coming up with a meaningful and personal ceremony, no prob (ha, we’ll see about this).But what if we put this much time, effort, emotion and money into this event and it is a dud? Honestly this ties into post #4 very closely. I had a TiVo season pass for TLC’s Four Weddings and learned one very valuable lesson. Don’t invite people who don’t love you. But this is easier said than done and, truthfully, some of the people who love me the most will still probably be complainers. How do you tailor a party to meet the needs of guests ranging from <1 up to nearly 80? I want everyone to have a good time. Everyone. Genuinely.

The kiddos I feel will be easy. They are known to be spontaneous dancers (which ROCKS!) plus I think we should have crayons and coloring books and etc. The tweens ought to be alright too. There will be a pool table at our venue and we’re thinking about having games on the tables. Plus I am VERY excited about tasking a handful of 12-13 year old girls that we know to do some of my bidding on the day of.

Adults are a WAY different story! Will people dance? Will people talk to each other? Will everyone enjoy the food/cake/music/drinks/fill-in-the-blank?

This Friday we’re having a New Year’s Eve party to practice our host-ing. M reminds me that people just need to be fed and imbibed and they’re 90% of the way to happy (most of my people don’t drink so that puts more emphasis on food). It is that 10% that tweaks me a bit.

Will report back after NYE on how well our entertaining went.

Christmas was great and surprisingly I only got one wedding related gift.


My mom


made me that bag to carry all of my brideing (TM) necessities. It was sweet and needs to serve as a reminder that she wants to be a part of the process.

Wedding post #3- Summer yearnings

So a search for “Seattle Washington seasonal flowers July” led me to this:


http://diy.weddingbee.com/topic/washington-seasonal-flowers-part-2

I am giddy beyond words! My plan for flowers has always been a big sweep of the farmers market that my sweet and I frequent. All summer they are filled with the most amazing bouquets of colorful stems and creative greens and they are as cheap as the dirt they grow in. My true heart is with dahlias because they are so amazingly intricate. I figured mid-late July would be the shoulder season for dahlias so they may or may not be readily available. But my heart just about burst when I saw all of the deliciously colorful stems that may be available to me that time of year.

http://diy.weddingbee.com/topic/washington-seasonal-flowers-part-2

The one snag will be if we wed on a Friday. Then I guess the plan will be to hit up Seattle’s everyday farmers market, Pike’s Place Market, and try to clean them out.

Touristy-yes. Awesome- also yes.

The bonus too is that a bunch of these are really fragrant. I had been grooving on the idea of maybe doing herbs as centerpieces since they would smell so darn good but fragrant flowers should do the trick too.

Oh flowers…I miss you.



(side note for those who don’t live here: As the days get shorter and colder the farmers markets start filling their bouquets in with cabbage heads and other creative winter alternatives, at first I thought this was adorable but now I just see it as the first sign of winter…sigh)

Wedding post #2: Dress and other internet obsessions

I have this deep urge to just order a bunch of dresses online. One I have actually tried on in real life but now want to see it again. The others just because they are cheap on Nordstrom's website. It is funny because I am fairly certain they won't be figure flattering for me. But I'm tempted because I figure I can always send them back. But what a waste of fossil fuel to have dresses flown around to me rather than, say, going shopping at a store.

This seems like a potentially bad idea.

What are the odds of actually liking myself in one enough to make it my dress?
How the heck do I explain that to my mom?
How will I evaluate myself in it without proper lighting and bridal consultants trying to stick a veil on my head?

Plus, I will have (as the count is tonight) 3 dresses on the way.

I'll resist the urge but it is most certainly there.


In other internet news. I am a total lurker on a few bridal forums that some terrible (amazing) friends suggested. They are so interesting! I like hearing what women are doing and it is cool to see how different things matter to different people. I want SO BAD to be crafty but I am worried that I'm not.

I think I have decided on a first project (when the time arrives) to test my Martha on.

I have a vision of a cake table with pictures cascading down and around.
Maybe I should just haunt Etsy for it at work home tomorrow :)

Engagement: Point/Counterpoint

My sweetie and I had a great weekend celebrating my birthday (and more…).  We both had so much to share about it that we decided to wait to write it all down until we could both do a blog post together.  So he and I are sitting next to each other right now writing about the weekend from our individual perspectives.

Michael’s story:

I wanted to surprise Amber for her birthday.  We’d both been lamenting how quickly the summer had passed us by so I wanted to surprise her with a weekend getaway to somewhere warm.  After much deliberation, I finally settled on California, specifically Coronado Island.  We’d planned to go to California earlier this summer but had to postpone and we had a lot of fun on our last California adventure for her high school reunion last summer, so I thought we would really enjoy it.  So I asked Amber if she could do a three-day weekend over her birthday (10/16) and went ahead and booked it.  All I told her was that she should pack for someplace warm.

It wasn’t until we were parking at the airport Friday evening that I revealed our destination.  I actually managed to surprise Amber, and we were both excited for the weekend.  Of course, I had another surprise for her, but she didn’t know that quite yet.



We arrived in San Diego late Friday evening, picked up a rental car, headed to Lowe’s Coronado Bay Resort, and finally settled in for the evening.  The next morning, we got up and after breakfast at the hotel, we headed out to do some exploring, starting with the beach.



The only downside in my clever plan to whisk us away to somewhere warm and sunny was that it turned out that San Diego wasn’t warm and sunny.  It wasn’t too cold, so it wasn’t too bad, but it was still overcast.  Unfortunately, I was hoping for a nice sunny beach for Amber’s next surprise.  So I decided I would wait and hope for things to clear up.

We wandered around Coronado for a while, getting sand in our shoes and checking out the houses near the beach, then decided to head to Old Town and maybe do a trolley tour.





It turned out that our visit coincided with an art fair there, so we wandered around the shops and the historic structures and checked out the art for some time.  Long enough to get pretty hungry.  But still no sun…

After looking around for a snack and not finding anything to our liking, we finally gave in and headed to El Cajon for the legendary carne asada burritos and fish rolled tacos.  We arrived at Guadalahara, but to our surprise, it was renamed and no longer served the fish rolled tacos.  At least they still had carne asada burritos.  And the person working there was a sister of a classmate of Amber’s that we had seen there last year.  As she did last summer, she asked if we were married yet.  Of course, the answer was no, but I got the feeling that the universe was trying to interject a little foreshadowing into our dining experience.



We checked out what was playing at a nearby drive in theater for possible entertainment options later, then headed back to the hotel to chill out in the pool.  Still no sun though…

When we got back to the hotel, Amber started getting ready to head to the pool, but I couldn’t wait for my other surprise any longer, so I told her that I had a surprise for her, but I wanted to give it to her by the water.  So we walked out around the backside of the complex to a view of the Coronado Bay and Bridge.  That’s where I took Amber in my arms and time kind of stood still.  I told her how much I loved her and how I wanted to share my love and our commitment with our family and friends.  I pulled out the box that had the wedding ring I’d been carrying with me all day and asked Amber if she would marry me. 

Amber has been telling everyone how cool I was all day long and how I didn’t let on like anything was up right up until I told her about the surprise and took her to the view of the bay.  My only explanation is that I didn’t have any reservations at all, that I know without a doubt that I love her and that she feels the same.  It was an easy question to ask.

Amber’s answer was yes. 

The rest of the weekend was great.  We hung around the pool (not for long because the sun never really came out).  We went to Mission Beach and rode the rollercoaster.  We went to Sea World and out for a great dinner at Prado at Balboa Park.  We went to the beach again.  But for me, the rest of the weekend was us basking in happiness.  And looking at the ring on Amber’s finger and being happy and in love.







Amber’s story:

A few weeks before my birthday, my sweetie told me we were going somewhere for my birthday! I was stoked, I figured Leavenworth or Victoria or somewhere nearby.

Then he asked which day I could take off, Friday or Monday. I said Monday and was even more excited.

About a week before he said we were flying and to pack for warm weather. I was totally blown away and curious where we were headed. I couldn’t wait to soak up some sun after the dreary summer we’d had. But where were we going?

We headed for the airport and pulled into the parking garage. Before letting a parking attendant steal his surprise he told me where we were going. Coronado Island!

I was really blown away. It was just too sweet. We’d been to San Diego together on what was one of my favorite trips to CA ever (thanks to having him as company). On that trip we’d driven over to Coronado because I had told him that as a kid it was one of the late night adventures my mom and aunts would take the kids on. We’d all pile in the car at midnight on a Saturday and drive over the bridge until the turn around point (so as not to pay the toll). When he and I were in SD in 2009 we’d driven over and gone to dinner and late night beach strolling down there. So it held a special place for me and for us together. In hindsight, maybe that should have been a clue J

Friday evening went so ridiculously smoothly. Made our flight- no prob, got our car- no prob and got into our hotel (one that I have LOVED since HS)- no prob. It was looking to be a seriously great weekend.

Saturday was my birthday. Sadly, it was kind of cold and dreary out. But no matter! We wandered around the beach for a bit, actually walking quite a while down the coast (potential clue #2?). Then, since the weather wasn’t clearing, we headed over to Old Town San Diego for touristy stuff. By this time we were just too close to my hometown to not stop by and have some carne asada burrito.

The woman at the taco shop had helped us when we were there last year and asked if we were married yet. We chuckled and said no. The Cap looked calm and cool.

We headed back to our hotel and had planned to go to the pool (it was 65 and cloudy but damn it, we were on vacation!). This is when his cool exterior cracked a bit. He said we should go for a walk out to the beach because he had a “surprise” for me. I did not see a software sized package in his hands.

My heart started to speed up.

We walked out to the terrace of the hotel which overlooks the bridge and the bay. Some of the most wonderful and loving words I’ve ever heard were spoken to me. Then he asked me to marry him and without a pause I said “yes!” I was totally stunned though. I didn’t expect it at all…until the walk for the surprise. I wanted to hear how he’d planned all this and how he had gotten a ring and HOW HE HAD ACTED SO COOL all day! I was in a bit of a daze over the fact that we’d just officially decided to join our lives. I was overjoyed by the fact that we’d just officially decided to join our lives.

I did manage to pull myself together a few minutes later and had a stranger take our pic.



We then went back to the room and held each other. And goofily stared at each other. Every once in awhile saying “forever!” or “we’re going to be married!” He was less goofy than me but he did have the advantage of having known it was coming!

Then we went and rode a rollercoaster by the beach. I called my Mom.



Seeing as it was still my birthday and there had yet to be cake, we went to Claim Jumper and got our favorite tiny toffee cake. And acted goofy there…taking pictures of us holding hands and such.



The rest of the weekend was spent being San Diego tourists and hanging out with my sweetie and happily wrapping our heads around the idea that we’d just made a sizable commitment to each other. There were a few mentions of what kind of wedding we’d have and more than a few mentions of what kind of marriage and life we wanted to have.



It was seriously one of the best weekends ever for me and I feel so loved and special. I am going to hold on to that feeling and work hard to make him feel loved and special every day.

**Note to my blog readers: Without shame I am going to talk about wedding planning. Running and biking and swimming too (well, hopefully …not that pre-wedding planning I have been the best at that) but also wedding stuff. And marriage stuff. Maybe work stuff too in the abstract. But the blog title “tri-ing to figure it out” will be renewed as figuring out how to get my booty in gear and maybe meet some new challenges (or revisit old ones), plan a wedding, prepare for a marriage and not get fired J I hope my 4 readers will understand.