Oh
My
Goodness
I probably could have used climbing gear. Man, I suck at hills but these were ridiculous!
Take a look:
And I'm still not to the top
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Ok, I guess this is a semi-obligatory reflective 9/11 post but, where the hell did time go?
Looking back on that scary day I feel like I was just a baby. 19 years old and so much left to figure out. The world seemed to be falling apart a bit.
Now it is NINE YEARS later. Holy hell!
I can't believe how much has happened since then. I was determined not to be scared by the crazy times I'd wound up in but I think what happened is, it didn't feel crazy. For me, life pretty much went on.
I finished school and started to make real life changing-type decisions.
I moved a couple times and wound up in WA and have not been in CA since 2003. I have nephews! And one of them just started school.
I have a job and sit in meetings. And sometimes people listen to what I have to say.
I realized how valuable I am to myself and that taking good care of my mind and body is not optional.
I found someone who made me see my future in a startling new way. And start to feel like there are at least two hearts that I have to take care of.
But there is still so much to figure out.
As most, I wanted to make the world a slightly better place. Or minimally be an active member of my community. I wanted to be a good friend to the people who always made me feel loved. I wanted to be loving to people who hadn't been as lucky as I to have encouraging people in their lives.
I guess I've dabbled in most of that but with an inconsistency that concerns me.
I have always said that I thought being an American was the best team I've ever been on. It's super cheesy but true. We fuck up. Pretty royally sometimes (watch a double feature of Charlie Wilson's War and The Kite Runner). But we're pretty damn awesome. And I need to get better at honoring the advantages that have come with the team.
Lately I've been kind of a self-pitying mope about how sad and hard life is. And it is. But I know it is sadder and harder for a lot of people. The fear and chaos of those people nine years ago, for example, is unfathomable. Even in my own life, people that I love have it much sadder and harder than I.
I can be sad and can acknowledge that things have been easier but I am going to try to appreciate that I have it in my grasp to make things better. That I have been given the gift of time to work on areas I feel I'm lacking and the luxury of being able to do it in this country where I have resources.
Sorry for the maudlin post. I'm a sob-fest lately.
30 Days of home cooking update:
Monday (8/30/10): Fail on dinner for me cause it was my crazy nephew's birthday but b-fast and lunch were good.
Tuesday (8/31/10): B-fast and lunch good and my super sweet sweetie made an amazing dinner of chicken shish tawook, rice, pita and salad with feta (why have I ignored feta for so long? Man that's good)
Wednesday (9/1/10): Again, super sweet sweetie came through and made an awesome dinner of salmon asparagus and leftover rice
Thursday (9/2/10): I was determined to be of use at dinner time but wound up working late so SSS made us a little bit of shrimp fried rice (still leftover from Tues) and an awesome salad with feta.
I am kicking myself for no photo documentation of our efforts. Maybe the next 26 days I'll be better.
I have had 2 pretty decent 5 mile runs indoors this month ;) I bought new shoes and want to figure them out before getting them too dirty to return (bought at Foot Zone Redmond, return policy is 30days- cash back only if not worn outside). They're OK. I mainly like them but there is an arch support feature that rubs a bit much and I am concerned that long runs that will be an issue.
I just realized I haven't started shredding yet and it is the 3rd! Good thing September has 32 days.
Sometimes I have a hard time zoning out on the treadmill and it feels long and boring and eventually I give up and head home. To combat this I try to come up with mental games to break up the time or distance, here is my new one:
When I first get on the treadmill I usually hit start and then walk at the 1mph that the belt starts at while I get myself situated (music selected, headphones in, towel and other accessories adjusted, etc.) then I ramp up and start running. But this minute or so KILLS the average pace.
So my new game is making up the lost time. And it is really freaking challenging! That minute of barely moving costs a lot. Say I want to average 10mi/mi for a 3 mile run, if I only wasted 1min at snail's pace I have to make that minute up by doing ~9:35ish miles for the rest of the time since that first minute covered basically no distance.
It seems like such a rip-off. And makes me lament my potty breaks during races even more. But it is a fun game and a way to run some negative splits without feeling like it is complete drudgery. Plus it motivates me to get my act together and get running quicker rather than lollygagging at 1mph