Baby Brick

Got in my first little brick in a very long while. I swam, then did a cycling class. Then I proceeded to eat 4 eskimo pies and a string cheese for dinner.

sigh

Oh well.

I guess it's training for my post race activities.

80 days to Issaquah!

Fear and old age

I think you become more fearful as you get older. Or, maybe more likely, fear is a bell shaped curve over age and I think I may be near the peak (or I hope). When you're little you fail to see the consequences of fearful situations and when you're older and wiser you realize that the consequences of reasonable risk is usually handlable.

I've been feeling more and more afraid of little things; I'll clutch the oh-shit-handle on the car when a friend drives too crazy, I'm all jumpy going from my car to the door in the dark, someone came soliciting to the door and now I am fully expecing him to come back and murder me (Description: white male, ~30's, really bad teeth), etc.

What prompted this rant is multi-fold. I'm worried about my Mom's and aunt's health. The XC runner, Chelsea King's murder was so all around heart breaking.I read a blog post about being afraid of alligators during an OWS (SHE is in FL where that is a valid concern). The Captain and I are getting ready to get back on our bikes (or more accurately, he is getting ready to ride again for the 1st tinme since his crash), I worry about him, I worry about me (I am PETRIFIED about eating it and knocking out teeth). Despite trying to be cool about it (since I know it's not a big deal) I am worried about my own health.

Not so much my current health but the fact that I am, heck, we all are, fighting a battle against our bodies. And from what it looks like, for those of us lucky enough to get to experience it, it sucks having your body break down on you.

For me, running has been pretty miserable the last few months. I get SO sick to my stomach and get some major intestinal ickiness. It has been most unpleasant.

I am having surgery in a week and actually I am really excited because I think (HOPE&PRAY) that it'll clear up some of the ickiness and I can get back to plodding along down the trail. But being the object of medical attention is still a new and helpless feeling and I don't look forward to more of it.

I am so grateful to have been healthy my whole life. I am still sorry that i wasted years making myself unhealthy and am SO grateful to have found somethhing I love that fits so well with a healthy lifestyle.

I do feel like I've learned I need to really listen to my body and be my own advocate. I have known I get sick running for a long time but I ignored it and made excuses (diet, fitness, physiology) and let it get to the point where things got painful.

Anyway, I have no idea the point of this post. Time to push through my irrational fear and be glad that I have so much good stuff going on that I'm afraid of losing anything. I need to keep working on keeping my body healthy and rage against the dying of the light. I need to get feeling better PDQ...81 days until Issaquah!!

Just saying

I think I'd be a better blogger if I typed well.

LSD

Well, my ickiness is definitely still dogging me. I haven’t had one run this year where I didn’t have some stomach discomfort. It is really very unpleasant. So, as reminded by SpeedyDMD, it is better to get Long Slow Distance in than to call it off entirely.
I had the day off today so I went out into the midday sunshine and did 6miles. They felt aggravatingly slow, about 2min/mi slower than my typical pace, and it wasn’t totally comfortable (I was in a bit of a rush to get home afterward) but it felt OK. More OK than any runs lately and longer than any runs in a long time.




I love being able to run in the middle of the day. Especially when I don’t have to rush back to work. I LOVE holiday weekends!
This whole weekend was so awesome, I feel like I really needed it. My sweetie, knowing how much I love the Olympics, took me to a sports bar to watch the opening ceremonies. We went to Jillian’s in Seattle and did a bit of video game Olympics ourselves, Air Hockey and video-skiing. Then TheCaptain schooled me in Ms. Pacman.
>

Saturday I packed and cleaned a bit for my big move to Redmond and then we met up for Chinese New year dinner.
Sunday I had the BEST Valentine’s Day ever! We did very little but did it all together. We had brownie waffles for breakfast and then TheCaptain made me yummy yummy trout for dinner. We watched lots of Olympics. I gave him the Scrabble wine charms I made and was VERY proud of my craftiness :)
Having today off and getting in a good run was definitely icing on the cake.

However, kinda inspired :)

It is a shame that my funk is coming out right now. Cause I am actually really inspired.

The Captain is learning to swim! And I think it is just about the coolest thing ever. It is hard to learn new stuff as an adult. Not only the learning process is harder but when you're a kid it is your main job to learn stuff. Not so as an adult (well, I guess technically that IS my job but….) you have to carve out time and energy to do it. So I am so happy for him and proud of him.

 

I am trying to be his swim instructor and was over-the-moon excited about helping him learn what I think is not only an essential life skill but a fun one. I have been excited about it for weeks but am now realizing that I have absolutely no credentials for swim instruction.

 

Here's what we've done so far:

Lesson 1: Floating and kicking

Lesson 2: Floating & pulling (w/buoy mainly to figure out how I can help him get breath during kick drills J), some kick refresher

 

Feedback from my student is that we work more on consistent floating so that is a will-do!

I hope he doesn't ask for his money back when he realizes I have NO idea what I'm doing :P

 

The one thing we do have going for us is that I love him, so we'll see.

 

And, after DSF reminded us that it can be risky for one partner to teach another something we're going to be especially cognizant of how we're doing as pupil/teacher so to be sure swimming isn't the end of us.

Motivation: Low

I'm not sure what is wrong with me. I just feel overall crappy and running just makes the crappiness bounce lately. I am really trying. I've run 2X this week and went to a cycling class (and swim instructed, another post). But I feel lacking both mentally and physically.

It feels very chicken/egg right now. Is running mentally hard because I'm physically bleh? Or am I physically bleh because running is mentally hard? Either way I have got to snap out of it.

 

I signed up for Issaquah Tri (1^st sprint of the season around here), paid the $$ and everything. Time to get out of this funk and get training.

Happy Runniversary to me!

It is fitting that my first post of the year is commemorating the 3 year anniversary of my very first run. Well, it was more like a sweaty, painful, oxygen deprived run/walk but it was 3 years ago today.

And I did the anniversary up in style too! I went for a run in Montpellier France with my dear friend. It was kind of a crappy run; cold and snotty. But it was a beautiful course and I had good conversation with someone I just don't get to chat with enough and I came back to her cozy apartment and got to cuddle with the Cap for a bit before he hand crafted us lattes to go with breakfast in our cute little French apartment.

Thanks Ali and Victor for all your generous hospitality. Staying here has been such a blast and getting to see your cuteness makes me happier than I can say.

Thanks Captain for coming on this trip with me. You are my favorite person to experience new things with and I am beyond grateful for the memories we've gotten to make here.

Thanks Self for sticking with the running for these past 3years. It has not always been easy or pretty but I'm SO glad that is has become part of who I am.

***
More on the trip and what is to come in the next running year later1!